Shop More Submit  Join Login
×

:iconlostmyslef: More from lostmyslef


Featured in Collections

Poetry by xMoonlightAngelx

Poetry by 4themindandsoul


More from deviantART



Details

Submitted on
June 13, 2013
File Size
1.9 KB
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
1,575
Favourites
125 (who?)
Comments
119
×
Pretty blue pills,
shiny in my palm,
the ticket to my peace,
to my eternal calm.

They're so perfectly round,
and soon they'll be in me.
The closest to perfect
that I'll ever be.

They go down so smooth.
Five, ten, fifteen and twenty.
Soon I'll be gone.
Twenty-five and Thirty.

That should be enough,
but I'll play it safe.
Thirty-five and forty.
Now I have no more to take.

The bottle is empty,
as empty as I feel.
None of this is happening,
too good to be real.

But soon I start to drift
into a dark unknown fog.
Somewhere quite distantly.
I hear a muffled sob.

But I blow it off as fake.
Nobody could possibly care.
I doubt anyone's noticed
that I'm no longer there.

But then I hear my name,
just a distant call.
I feel myself lift higher.
No! I want to fall!

I ignore the voice in earnest,
but it's calling me up, up, up.
Please let me be.
That life was too tough.

I like this fog,
this numbing haze,
free from the ridicule,
from the judging gaze.

But inevitably I come up,
eyes open so slight.
There are people all around
and a harsh fluorescent light.

Damn, it didn't work.
How many times must I try?
I struggle against the doctors,
please let me die.

I'll be locked up here awhile,
among these padded walls,
but soon they'll let me go,
and I'll answer death's calls.

I guess pills aren't my thing.
I'll try something new.
Maybe a gun,
yes, those survivors are few.

Good-bye world.
This will be my last try.
There's no chance for survival,
finally time to die.
Alright, this one's really long and not so good, but I needed to just let my feelings out on this, so leave me alone about it pretty please. No mean comments. Critiques are always nice, but I really can't afford any put downs right now.
Add a Comment:
 
:iconraphandroll:
RaphAndRoll Featured By Owner Mar 20, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I loved this one and I hope that you feel better. People with such talent don't deserve to feel this way.
Reply
:iconamewaalk:
amewaalk Featured By Owner Nov 26, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
this is really great.  i thank God everyday for people like you who can put what others just don't dare to say down in such beautiful words.  
thank you <3
Reply
:iconlostmyslef:
lostmyslef Featured By Owner Dec 23, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
No problem, thank you for such a beautiful comment
Reply
:iconimagoinfinitum:
imagoinfinitum Featured By Owner Jul 9, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
...are you referring to Xanax?
Reply
:iconrosescarlet:
RoseScarlet Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2013  Student Writer
I love the emotion in this poem. It is really good. Please don't think that no one cares, even if they are random strangers on the internet SOMEBODY cares and wants you to be alright. Including me. Okay? And don't regard those negative comments as put downs, they just want to help you but don't know a good way to do it. :) :huggle:
Reply
:iconlostmyslef:
lostmyslef Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thanks =)
Reply
:iconrosescarlet:
RoseScarlet Featured By Owner Jul 8, 2013  Student Writer
You're welcome :)
Reply
:icontheredbrickwall:
TheRedBrickWall Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2013
I am speechless. This so so emotional, but the words flowed nicely.
I don't know you, but I hope everything turns out alright.
Reply
:iconlostmyslef:
lostmyslef Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
thank you
Reply
:iconsabrinathess:
SabrinaTheSS Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2013
My boyfriend shot himself in the head. We were together for about a year when his best friend died, and he couldn't handle the grief. It hurts still, and he did this in November. Please just hang in there, alright? You're worth it. This is a very well written poem, so keep it up. Keep writing to let off your emotions in a positive way. I do the same thing. *hugs* Stay strong.
Reply
Add a Comment: