[x]

The DreamThe smile makes me shiver.
Cold runs down my spine.
I know what he wants,
wants to take what's mine.

But I won't let him.
No, now this is my story.
I will be the victor.
He can't have the glory.

He lurches forward,
but I knew he would.
I remember everything now.
I do what I should.

I jump to the side,
run for the door.
I smile at the "thump"
as he hits the floor.

I've nearly reached the handle,
suddenly I feel his hand.
No, I have to keep trying,
but I don't understand.

Why am I fighting?
He would never hurt me.
I let go of the handle,
turn around easily.

He smiles once more,
something tells me to run,
but why would I leave him?
We alwa

My SongThe music swirls all around,
till all I hear is the joyous sound,
twirling, spinning, moving me,
and the endless notes are all I see.

The beat becomes my hearts own.
I feel as though the light has shown,
and all the sadness fades away,
and I finally see a happier day.

My lips part, and I sing along
To such a redeeming, beautiful song.
These moments come and go too fast.
I enjoy them greatly as they last.

I laugh in glee.
I feel so free.
What magic is this,
this utter bliss?

Stay with me, my pretty song,
with you the days don't seem so long.
With you I am so filled with hope,
I know with you, somehow I'll cope.

Together we'll stay.
You'll

My smileMy smile was once so easy,
a thing of joy and pride,
but over these years of darkness,
the ease has slowly died.

I find it's no longer truth,
but simply a lying mask.
It hides away the misery,
the hauntings of my past.

I refuse to look at pictures.
I see what others ignore.
The uneasiness of my smile.
How it has turned into a chore.

Will I ever truly smile,
with joy, pride, and truth,
or will I never know a smile?
Will it die with the rest of my youth?

Please, i wish to laugh,
to smile without a care,
but I'm not good enough for this,
and I guess that is fair.

Won't Give InI'm getting weak,
can't find the light.
Too tired to try,
Too tired to fight.

I want to give in,
let my grip slip,
start the fall,
let myself trip.

But I can't let go.
I need to stay here.
Despite all the hardships,
despite all my fear.

I'll keep going.
I won't give in.
Though I feel like dying,
though my chances are grim.

So say hello to me,
this act I put on,
till my time comes,
till God says I'm done.

Memories?How do you stay sane,
when the screams echo in your ears?
This is not a game,
these are living fears.

I'm searching for the truth,
but find only confusion.
Was it a secret in my youth,
or just an illusion?

Did he really hit her,
or was it a dream?
It's all such a blur,
and things aren't always as they seem.

Should I ask them?
No, they'd never tell.
Was it enough to condemn?
Will he go to hell?

Did he really do it?
Do I even want to know?
Maybe I should quit,
let the memories go.

Ignorance is bliss,
that I know too well.
The memories, I dismiss.
Send them all to hell.

Time To GoYou climbed all the way up,
just to fall so far down.
You're screaming in fear,
but no one hears a sound.

And as you fall into the dark,
that you fought so hard to ignore,
you begin to realize
this is what you've waited for.

As your heart goes cold,
and you no longer feel,
you smile just slightly,
hope this is real.

No more fighting,
no more screams,
say good-bye
to all the bad dreams.

You'll be alone now,
what you've always wanted.
Your fears can no longer reach.
You'll never again be haunted.

So smile as the darkness
wraps you up tight.
Embrace the cold touch,
ignore all the light.

You'll be happier here,
this I know.
Soon I'll join y

I LiedCheated, betrayed,
that's what I've done to you
I should've cried, should've stayed,
I understand if we're through.

The truth was right there,
in the back of my mind.
You might've even cared,
comforted me, been kind,

but I was so scared,
how could I say the truth?
I have never dared
to tell the horrors of my youth.

So I locked them up tight,
told another lie.
I did what was right,
though it urges me to cry.

You don't need to know,
the memories are for me.
I wish I could let them go,
just let someone see,

but they're my curse,
so leave me be,
until my ride in the hearse,
the death of me.

My MaskI put my mask on.
Time to face the day.
Time to plaster on a smile.
Time to pretend it's okay.

I want to crawl in bed.
Leave the world behind.
You're too ugly to go out,
whispers my mind.

I know I am,
I stifle a cry.
I want to leave,
I want to die.

My mask is done,
and I have to go.
Time to face the people.
Time to put on my show.

Train to NowhereI'm on a train,
going nowhere,
Can't see through the rain,
I try not to care.

It's moving too fast,
but how do i slow?
Am I running from my past,
or just eager to go?

I know I should stop,
try to get a grip,
but this train is on lock,
and my sanity begins to slip.

Would it be so bad to ride,
to let this train go on?
We all know that I lied,
that I'm too far gone.

I can never be me,
no matter how I try.
Can't you see?
This has all been a lie.

So I'll sit and relax,
let the train run.
Maybe the train will crash.
Wouldn't that be fun?

I Met MeToday I met a girl,
and she asked, "How are you?"
"Just fine," I replied.
She said, "No, tell me what's true."

Perplexed, I stopped and stared.
She was young, no older than eight.
Her eyes were still innocent.
They knew no hate.

"What did you say?"
I asked in confusion.
"You know what I mean," she said.
This girl was in a delusion.

Trying to be kind,I replied,
"No I do not."
She frowned and replied,
"You lie quite a lot."

Now I was agitated.
What does this girl know?
Acting like she's so intelligent.
I'll just tell her to go.

"Let me explain!"
She exclaimed in haste.
"I know you're not alright.
I know you feel misplaced."

What?
How in

FallingThis feeling in my chest,
Like I'm about to burst,
And I cannot find the words
To correctly describe this curse.

I want to scream till I'm hoarse,
Smack my hands against the wall,
As I struggle to express
My emotional f
a
L
L
That's what it is,Falling.
Down my sanity goes.
I have to find a grip
Before this free fall comes to a close.

But I cannot find my voice.
The whispers tickle at my ears.
Is it finally going to end,
After all of these years?

Find a grip.
Can't, this is the end.
Wish i could find the strength
To say good bye to my friend.

And a love that I'll miss.
One I was grateful for.
I love you ple

Cold HeartedI'm tearing them down,
Piece by piece.
Let the walls fall,
Let the pain increase.

I stare my pain in the face,
Let it rip me a part.
Show what I've always feared,
In the depths of my cold heart.

I review my lack of care,
All the people that I've hurt.
When did I become so cold?
When did loved ones turn to dirt?

What happened to me?
Once so loving and kind.
When did it get so bad?
Did I suddenly lose my mind?

I want to trust again,
To love and to care,
But is the risk to high?
Is the cost of pain fair?

I realize that it's not.
I'm safe within my walls.
So much better to be cold,
Then to get hurt in the fall.

Secret WordsI know you need help.
It's so plain to see.
Please don't hurt yourself.
You can count on me.

I'll hold you when it's tough,
wrap you up tight.
I know life is rough,
but I'll be your light.

I love you, I do.
You're everything to me.
you don't believe it's true,
but I want to set you free.

I'll be your rock
when all your strength is gone.
I'll be your lock
when everythings gone wrong.

So please don't cry,
my love, my life.
I know you want to die,
but I'll help you through the strife.

Because I'll be there to catch you
when everything falls apart.
I love you, it's so true,
with all of my heart.

My Immortal FriendWhere are you,
my sweetest friend?
When did our friendship
come to an end?

I don't remember much,
but I know you're there.
I can feel your presence,
heavy in the air.

My immortal soul,
you should be gone.
Your heart stopped beating.
Your time is done.

And yet you stay,
unseen but not unknown.
Do you still recognize me?
I know I've grown.

Were you always here,
or did you just come back?
Why can't I see you?
Is there something I lack?

He sees you though.
I know it's true.
His innocent eyes
always pointed towards you.

Are you his friend now?
What happened to me?
Did we have a fight?
Just let me see.

I don't understand.
What went wrong?
W

TightropeI don't look down,
don't look back,
ignore the chills
all down my back.

I can feel their arms,
steady at my sides,
my truest hopes,
my loving guides.

They keep me on track,
no need for fear.
I've got them for comfort,
my friends so dear.

But sometimes one fades,
their arms tired and annoyed,
and I'll start to slip,
my balance destroyed.

I need them both,
or surely I'll go,
down down down,
ruining the show.

As long as I have them,
I'll keep going on,
until I figure this out,
until the tightrope is gone.

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Are you blind?Are you blind to my misery,
Or do you choose not to look?
I want to share my story,
But you close me like a book.

I'm screaming as I cry,
But you refuse to hear.
Look away as I die,
Ignore each little tear.

Am I not loud enough?
Is that why you ignore my scream?
My life is tough,
Help me escape this bad dream.

I scream a bit higher.
Please, I need your help!
My circumstances are dire.
I'm losing myself.

But you do not help me,
And I've decided to give up.
Maybe then you'll see.
Ha! That's just my luck.

End of my ShowI'm lost,
Can't find my way.
I'm confused and scared.
It gets worse everyday.

Someone show me,
is there a way to escape?
A way to get out?
Or is this just my fate?

I'll do anything.
I need to be free!
Escape this darkness,
find the real me.

But I find it hopeless.
I will never get out.
There's no use in fighting.
No reason to shout.

I'm giving in,
letting myself go.
No more acts,
the end of my show.

Want it to EndOn days like this,
I don't want to pretend,
don't want to try,
just want it to end.

I can't look in the mirror.
I hate what I see.
This creature looking back,
It can't be me.

But it is,
and so I cry.
I can't do this.
I want to die.

The voice says I'm right.
I don't deserve to be here.
I stop my whimpering,
and shed one last tear.

Grab the knife,
I dig it in.
Send me to hell,
for all my sin.

I'm happy to go.
I want to leave.
No one cares.
No one will grieve.

They'll forget my life,
and for that I'm glad.
No one should remember.
There's no reason to be sad.

My MonstersI can't breathe.
It's too tight.
I hear so many things,
can't trust my sight.

The monsters surround.
No, they're not really here.
They reach out to grab me.
They smell my fear.

Have I finally lost my mind?
Am I totally insane?
Is this all in my head?
Is it just a sick game?

Or are they really there?
Do they smile as I scream?
Do they laugh at my tears?
Please, let this be a dream.

But it's not a dream.
I can't get out.
A hand surrounds my neck,
no air to shout.

Tears stream freely.
They start to close in.
I pray to god to help me,
to forgive all my sin.

The world starts to fade.
I can no longer see.
I smile in bliss.
I'm finally free.

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Submitted: February 19
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Your Light, My Fear

by ~lostmyslef, Feb 19, 2013, 12:36:34 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Concrete Poetry

The walls are starting to cave.
I can't find the will to pretend.
I don't want to be your slave.
I just want this to end.

I can't take the fear,
the uncertainty of not knowing.
Can't you see, dear?
My strength is slowly going.

Are you there for me?
Will you catch me when I fall?
Because you don't seem to see.
You don't answer my call.

Am I a fool to believe?
Is this all just a lie?
Are you just waiting to leave?
Don't care if I die.

I wish I could run,
but i can't find the will.
I pick up the gun,
but find little urge to kill.

So I'll stay here,
no need to fight.
Ignore my fear,
focus on your light.